mean mama

in no particular order
January 29, 2008, 7:11 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

1. I forgot to call for the FSH results last night following Friday’s amnio. Then I forgot to call this AM. Then someone called from the office and was like, “Uh, didn’t the doctor tell you to call for your FSH results on Monday afternoon?” Me:”Ur… um… I guess I, uh, forgot?” Her: “Yeah, well, it all looks good. And you’re having a-” Me:”I don’t want to know!!!” Her: “Alrighty then.” Who still says “alrighty then?”

2. I am really trying hard to resist finding out the sex. I think it’s a better approach this time round. For one thing, I don’t have a strong preference, so there is no very compelling reason to find out. For another, I think if I had time to think about it, I would come up with reasons to be worried about having a girl or having a boy. I am wacky like that. Anyway, I think it’s a boy, because when the ultrasound tech at the amnio was looking around at the sex organs and we were looking away, she asked what had at home. I said, “two boys!” She repeated, “two boys…” in this really unenthusiastic way. And believe you me, when you have two boys, everyone, and I mean everyone, wants you to have a girl. I mean, wouldn’t it be just pitiful if a mother had to raise three boys but never had a female in the family with whom to discuss her menses? I shudder to think.

3. I have come to the difficult decision that I am going to take a weekly intramuscular injection of progesterone for the rest of my pregnancy in hopes of preventing pre-term labor. It’s really hard to know what to do. I had twins last time, and that was probably the cause of the pre-term labor; however, I am still considered high-risk, no matter whom you talk to: doctors, midwives, insurance. They all give me an elevated risk for going in to labor early. When I think about having a preemie, or even having to be on terbutaline again, the progesterone seems like a good, preventative option. Apparently one third of women who take progesterone make it to term, and most of the others make it further than they did in their last pregnancy. Unfortunately, it’s a new treatment, and there is no data to see how kids of progesterone-treated women are doing 10, 20, 30 years down the line.

4. My amnio went fine, but I’d definitely describe it as creepy. Not something I’d look forward to if I had to do it again. I mean, they stick a needle in the sac where the baby is. That’s just crazy!

5. I still don’t know what to do about doctors or hospitals. My practice is like an hour away from where I live, and the hospital and NICU are too. I vowed that this time I’d go to the local hospital. I really wanted to go with midwives, but I guess I just feel uncomfortable with their lack of expertise on high-risk stuff – less because I think they’ll mess something up and more because I need to feel like I am guided by people who know the intimate details of what can go wrong in pregnancy and up-to-the-day knowledge on what to do about it. The midwives said they’d transfer me to a high-risk doctor if I was having trouble, but there are two problems with that: 1)not all doctors, even high-risk doctors, will take on a woman in later pregnancy and 2)I would have to start a new relationship with another doctor, and that does not thrill me. I actually really like my current doctors. If I knew for sure that I would not have to have a preemie in a far-away NICU, I don’t think I’d consider transferring at this point. This whole thing is really stressing me out.

6. Who the hell gets that “honeymoon of pregnancy” thing in the second trimester? My nausea is better, and that is TERRIFIC, but I still throw up in the mornings, and I still feel like the walking dead come 6PM.

7. I still don’t know whether I’ll be working PT or FT next year. I think it will depend on which opportunity comes my way. I love my school and want a future there. I also love working. I think it would be hard for me to put a baby in daycare full time, but on the other hand I am ready to teach full-time. Also, if I work part-time, I will probably be paying to work by the time I pay for 3 kids in part-time daycare. If I work full-time, it will even out. (And if anyone out there is wondering why I don’t just quit my job and stay home with all 3 kids, thereby eliminating the money problem, I will gladly write you a long list of why that is such a bad idea for me at this point.)

8. I love this baby and am getting really exciting with each new month. Also terrified. I wish the pregnancy part could just be skipped, and I could be guaranteed a healthy, full-term newborn.

Soon, I’m going to write a post about why I don’t think I could ever successfully become a part of a mother’s group. It’s mostly because I can’t play nice with others, don’t enjoy a competitive spirit, and have no tolerance for know-it-all types. And also because I’m a mean mama.


4 Comments so far
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I love this post. I am SO happy your results were good and that you foiled the person trying to tell you the sex. I am also glad you are excited. And I think the shots sound wise.

I CANNOT WAIT for the anti-mom group post. FYI, none of the moms in my group are competitive. I think sometimes someone gets inadvertently annoyed if they wanted to breastfeed but couldn’t and someone is gushing about it or something. But I am pretty much the only know it all. But 2 things – 1, I may have just gotten lucky. 2, today I found out that one of our members who used to come at the very beginning stopped coming because she didn’t like us! So what do I know!? FWIW, she had a colicky baby and I think we may have frustrated her because we all looked like we had easy babies even if that wasn’t true.

Comment by Bri

Also, I would pay money for you to attend moms group as a meanmama spy and write about it here.

Comment by Bri

Congrats on the great amnio results–yippee!!

Haha, about the wanting a girl after two boys…I get the opposite, with people wondering, “Are you going to try for a boy?” Really, now, what’s wrong with what we’ve already got? Plus, such a comment just magically assumes that 1) if we wanted another, we could get pg just . like . that and 2) if we want a specific gender, well, damn, we’re certain to get it–all we need to do is put our order in early. Um, yes, because similar to what you said, we could really use a boy in the house to diffuse all this estrogen, what with all the discussions of menses to come and all 🙂

And I sooo hear you on the mother’s group thing…those are precisely the reasons that I never even entertained the idea of joining one. Of course, I hear that the other moms (without being in a mom’s group) once your kid(s) gets to school are just as bad. I’m not looking forward to that as you can well imagine.

Comment by Dee

Congrats on the great results!

I’m glad you kept them from telling you the sex (though even the clue in tone of voice SUCKS, why did the tech need to ask what you had at home?? You have a lot of things at home!). My cousin didn’t want to know the sex of her 2nd baby (1st was a girl) and after a genetic test she was told “Both X chromosomes are fine.” Stupid doctor.

I am very curious about the mom’s group thing. I think it will relieve me because a) I have yet to become a part of one, and I feel like I am Doing Something Wrong, and b) I have a feeling I might not be great at it.

Comment by Lo

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